My Yoga Practice--- Slow Flow...Really Slow...

Pretty Autumn colours at the Anglesey Abbey

23/Oct/2015

I was feeling really down and really peeed off with work and my life in general, I blamed on the changing the season bit. Marcus and I went to Devon--Dartmoor a few weeks ago for a week or so and I really had a fantastic break. Couldn't fault anything we did.  However, on our return, I started feeling really down, reality hit...going back to work, pay bills, etc. Usual holiday blues.

Anyway, I could not get up back myself for a few weeks, I missed my yoga classes I love ( I was home practising), then I did my back in a bit.  Then this early week, someone said something about me at work which knocked my confidence off. I felt even more grumpy and fed up, getting really down.... 

Just about working on letting go, I went to my favo yoga class on Thursday evening. That seemed to lifted some of my feelings off, they all came up, became feeling really angry and pissed off. I kind of took it out on Marcus, bless him, really patience with me. I was tired and grumpy all day that day. luckily I'm having 5 days off, so I got time to chill out before going back to work and kill someone.... 

On Friday evening, I went Y12SR which Jacqui facilitates, I really enjoyed it. It's different from open classes, we share (just like NA/AA meetings), and do some asanas. It was even slower than her usual Y12SR class, it was really slow. But it seemed to clear or helped to shift something inside me, when we finished, I was feeling quite vulnerable. 

I told Jacqui how I felt and she told me because it was so slow, there was no where to escape from feelings/emotions I was feeling. I needed to feel it, face it and deal with it. I felt everything, differences between (normal speed) vinysa flow and the class we just did, how I moved, how all transitions to how I was feeling, how my body was feeling and what I was doing and whole lot. It was amazing. And I was really touched. I had tears on my face. I was sad and the same time I was overwhelmed with the beauty of slow flow.

Hung on, really? Does it happen in participating a Yoga class? Yes, it does. I can only speak form my own experience, not someone else's. 

It was like: when you listen to beautiful music or even someone singing, it touches your heart and tears coming out. It was like that. I love her slow vinyasa flow yoga. It's something really special. When I'm feeling grumpy it helps me to move my energy inside and evens out/ balance. When I'm happy it helps me to have unconditional love. 

Jacqui told me I got my connections back, yup, feel more myself again. 

Feel like I'm growing (not my height...) with my practice.

My Yoga Practice---First time self-practice at the studio

 Our wise Yoda was away that week. She gave me and my yoga buddy Lee spare keys to open the studio for self-practice. She told us she couldn't get covers while she was away, but open the space for self-practice and free to use. 

So, Lee was opening up for 2 sessions and I was opening for 4 sessions. I'd never been self-practiced in the studio and never been inside without teachers. So I was a bit nervous. This was what happened.

22/Aug/2015 Saturday

Our first self-practice session, 4 of us turned up. I thought it was good start.

I felt a bit awkward without Jacqui, feeling uncomfortable. More like, "I-don't-know-what-to-do".
When 9:30am came, Lee said: "Shall we start?" Then all of us slowly beginning to practice.

I started off with quick meditation, then did some Pranayama. After that, I slowly warm myself up to standing, balancing, core work etc...Finished with supported savasana.

We all were sweating. I sweat a lot, just like when I was in Jacqui's class. Good job I had my towel with me...

I was looking at my notebook time to time to check what I was going to go next, but ended up changing them anyway. I wanted to practice sequences I made up. It was good I did that, Sometimes I didn't feel right doing it, sometimes o.k. It depended on how I felt or not-quite-right....

Then I realised that morning, it was just like cheffing. When I was a chef, making up menus and recipes, I combined different flavours might work, experiment then made/cooked them up, tasted then made adjustments. They might need to add some more herbs, seasoning or even change ingredients completely! Either loved it or didn't liked it. 

Writing a class plan/or individual is for me much like that. Think about your clients, make something work for them, and require some imagination and creativity. I love anything creative. I'm not particularly good at it, but I know what I'm good at....

While we were in savasana, I felt same energy I feel sometimes in Jacqui's class in evenings. Almost as If spirit people/ energy was swaying through between us, dancing away and it was fantastic. When I opened my eyes on my sitting position/ sitting qi-gong I was doing, it was very quiet and peaceful. It was like we were between air/space. Fantastic.


That was good start. On Thu practice, I was on my own at the studio. I had fantastic self practice. I did just over 90mins, I mediated 20mins after that, I felt it was just natural progression to meditate. I just wanted to feel what I was feeling. Feeling of peace and between space. "nothing" no sound, no air, no nothing. It was very still. Hard to explain, it was like at the same time I became a particle in the space. 

Yoga does some funny thing, doesn't it...

It was the day only me turned up for self-practice...