My yoga practice--- "I'm not sure..."

Cute bee working hard....

10/Dec

I cancelled this evening's class earlier today. Why? I decided to have a night off for doing ebay listing. I got a few things to list, it's my day off, thought good time to do....  (or just an excuse?)

To be honest, I went a class in my local yoga centre last night, and I wasn't expecting it, but I got muscle pain on my bottom and my hammys are tight! I felt I won't last Jaqui's class, so, I decided to have a rest till  tomorrow early morning class.

Well, I decided to not to go back to the yoga centre even for yoga classes (where I used to work as a chef in the yoga centre), I don't really like the place. But I thought, I'm going there for me, not anything else (or anyone else), if I see a person I'm not keen on, I just smile, chances are, she will smile at me too anyway.

So, I booked a class for Wednesday eve for vinyasa flow. I was a quite nervous, I wouldn't know the yoga person, I wouldn't know how the class would be, How many people would be etc... but the same time, I couldn't hide my excitement.

I got there early. All very familiar environment with new staffs and new things.

Anyway, when I went upstairs to the studio, I saw the yoga lady/teacher and thought, "why lots of yoga teachers/instructors are thin and tall?" I'm the completely the opposite. I'm petite (good word!), and slightly chubby.....

When class started, I was participating it, but I could hear my own voice saying : "I'm not sure about this, I don't think I like her class..." It was only 5 mins in, c'mon, give her chance! As class went on more and more, "I'm still not sure about this, too fast and I don't like this sequence" My head didn't shut up did it. Then, I told myself, f**k it, I let go. After that point, it became fun. I enjoyed practising arm balances, did plank sequences different from one's I'm used to. I don't have to like everything she does, as long as I found something I had fun with. I'm happy with that. 

11/Dec

I went to see Siobhan this morning. She was my first ever yoga teacher (also my boss at the yoga centre), and after all these years, I still love her class. I sometimes (whenever I can) go to her classes in the boiler house yoga studio in my local town. I told her my last night experience, then she shared hers with me. She experienced the same when she attended a class last week. We smiled at each other.

I love Siobhan's class. She  teaches Hatha yoga (she's also a Ashtanga teacher). Funny thing is, I sometimes miss practising Hatha and feel like I really need it, it always a right time when I have a day off to be able to go and see her. Basically, I feel sometimes I want to spend more time in each asanas, it's a bit like spending time with old friends, I feel like my body needs it (mentally, physically), and feel much better afterwards. 

It was very creative class this morning. We used balls to do few asanas to give our body massage. It was really pain but nice pain to my back muscle and knots.

I walked back home with my yoga buddy from her class, she was an old lady in her late 70's (I think), bless her, she's been coming to Siobhan's class for looooong time (10 years)! She explained to me how she liked her class and her spiritual journey in a nut shell through yoga, and gave me a big smile. She isn't a hippy lady, she's a regular lady with many injuries in the past. 

I'm really looking forward to see Siobhan on 23rd Dec, it's going to be the last class for this year, and I got a day off. I'm working from 24th till new years day, which I don't mind at all, everyday is Christmas for me,  feeling lots of love, cozy, yummy and warm....

Saffron Yoga
www.saffronyoga.co.uk
 siobhan@saffronyoga.co.uk.

My yoga practice--- Sunday practice

My favo tree in the Ickworth park

7th/ Dec

Hooray!, It was Sunday I was looking forward to, lovely Helen's Ashtanga yoga workshop. It was only a small group, it was 5 people including myself and Helen. She was a great teacher, and makes practise such a fun. To me, Ashtanga yoga practise can be really intimidating and regimental. I think that's one of reasons put me off getting into it for long time. 

I like how Helen correct postures and teach how to do breathing, I think more like her personality makes the practise less intimidating and less regimental. She did say in the beginning, it didn't matter not be able to get into asanas, it was a fun, not to suffer (something like that), basically, yoga is a fun, not pain. I liked that. That's exactly how I pursuit not only my yoga practise, also tai chi and qi gong. Andy (my friend also my teacher on tai chi & qi gong) always said: 'think something makes you smile" with eyes closed. That was how we begun our practise.   

Anyway, how many times, I almost giggled during our practise (I did giggle though). I really enjoyed it and made me want to do more and more. Savasana was really a treat, after all the hard work. When we got up, and opened our eyes, Helen asked me:

"How was it?"
"Actually I really liked it and really enjoyed it" I answered with big smile.

I thanked Helen before I left the studio. I do practise it at home with youtube video (Lesley Fightmaster and Nichi Green form Eckhart Yoga), but still not confident enough to attend classes. So, to me, workshops like these really help me. I did a few with Brenda (chillout yoga in Sudbury, Suffolk), that was good fun and all! I would love to attend more workshops, but my bank statements don't look very good, need to make more money!!!

When I was on my way home, I couldn't stop smiling, actually, I was smiling all day after that. 

My yoga practice--- Ashtanga yoga & Me

5/Dec

I've just been back from my Saturday morning class. As usual, it was lovely practise. I was talking to my yoga buddy, Vic, who put her mat next to me, (oh, she's such a lovely person!) started talking about ashtanga yoga. That was because there's ashtanga yoga workshop By lovely Helen Shepherd tomorrow morning,...( Which I've been really looking forward to...)

 Vic asked me about biding poses. For long time, I convinced myself reason why I couldn't do was due to my hyper-extended arms. For me, biding poses are killer, I still can't get into some of them. I told her; "my arms are not long enough to either bind or lift myself up." She smiled. "If I could cut off some of my tummy and stitched to my arms to extend, then I would be able to do them"

Then, Jacqui (our teacher) looked at us with big smile and explained that all our bodies were made to proportion. Helen is a tall lady, she's got long arms and long legs, she can easily lift herself up or bind her arms. Oh, I was a bit suspicious what Jacqui told me, I feel like my arms & legs are really short. To back up my theory, I usually shorten hems on my trousers (if I buy kids/cropped sometimes they are right length!).... But Jacqui comforted me with a few more explanation, so, I settled on "our bodies are proportioned."

So, that makes even harder now, in order to get into those poses, I need to work on my core even harder..... Am I not working hard enough???? 

Anyway, I told Vic, "It's all good fun anyway, I always smile to myself on yoga mat..." I even laugh at myself when I home practise alone. I either roll round or things I do, quite often...... funny.........(By the way, I realised recently I laugh/giggle a lot. apparently, a couple of our clients at work refer me as "the lady who laughs a lot" then my colleagues know who they are talking about...)

I was really in a cheerful mood after the practise this morning. On Savasana, it was like floating on Agen sea in Greece. Feeling the waves, pretty lights and colours, I even could hear sound of the water (it might be tinnitus on my left ear though) When the class was finished, it was crisp and beautiful morning with sun shine. 

Then I strolled back to home.

Hungrie Norie's Raw Nik-Naks 6---Raw chocolate squares

I love my chocolate, who don't? I've been buying lots of them lately, so, I decided to make them again. Some of raw chocolate taste like rubber, and don't melt nicely in mouth. Some can taste really grainy.... I have my favo brand, only a small bar and cost a bit compare to cheap chocolate. They are yummy and worth paying for.

Lots of raw chocolate recipes I've looked at have either honey or agave nectar in them, coconut nectar sounds good, but here in country town of Suffolk, no one sells it. I don't want to wait on line delivery, when I want to do something, I want to do it NOW. So, quite often, ordering on line is no good for me.

So, I used coconut sugar again. It doesn't make anything sweeter or anything in my opinion, but it gives nice flavour and cuts off bitterness from the cacao powder. I wanted sugar free and vegan, so, I added some nuts and sultanas. 

Here's the recipe, add some nice protein powder or any super food powder etc or edible oil make chocolate even taste nicer. I only add vanilla powder though, simple......

Half cup cacao powder

Half cup coconut oil

Half cup cacao butter (melt below 45℃, I kept it about 35-40℃, no re-heating)

2 tablespoon coconut sugar (I don't think it's completely raw)

2 teaspoon vanilla powder (I'm not sure they are completely raw)

2 tablespoon each cashew nuts and sultanas

1 tablespoon cacao nibs

Melt cacao butter and add to cacao powder and vanilla and coconut sugar. While melting cacao butter, cream coconut oil really well.  (like making cake mix, butter and sugar to cream). Then, hold coconut oil into chocolate mixture and add some nuts and sultanas. It cools down quick, so, quickly do all. Put the mixture in lined tray (need to be already ready!), using parchment paper, flatten the surface. Hands be better with the paper, body temperature soften it. Then, when it's flat, put the parchment paper on the top of chocolate, tidy up, cool it in the fridge till set. Take out, cut into squares. 

I keep mine in my fridge.... 

When coconut oil melts, it doesn't melt together with cacao butter, means, it split/ separate. That's why I creamed it and fold in to it. 

Actually not many people tell you coconut oil doesn't melt together with cacao butter. If coconut oil is really creamed and similar texture and temperature with chocolate mixture, they combine really well (Remember making frangipane? It's a bit like that). I've made another batch since my last one, I added protein powder (vegan, raw) and carob powder. Ratio of fat and powder is different from last one, due to coconut oil melts quick in my hands and making my finger really messy........

Here's the recipe I did for second batch:

1 cup Cacao butter
Half cup Cacao powder
1 tablespoon Carob Powder
2 tablespoon protein powder
3 tablespoon Coconut sugar
3 teaspoon Vanilla powder
1/4 cup chopped hazel nuts
2 tablespoon sultanas
2 tablespoon cacao nibs
sprinkle grated coconuts on top

It's fun to play with recipes but I don't earn lots of money from my day job, so, I don't want to waste my ingredients. They are not cheap in U.K, I tend to use anything in my cupboard lying round. It's a bit similar to making a pizza isn't it? Top with anything you like!

I really liked this one, I gave a piece to my friend Tony (he's a fussy chef), and he even liked it. Chefs are really fussy on someone else's food, so i got a complement, that means good. 

I found going raw food completely is costly and I don't seem to have enough time making everything from scratch. I do what I can and when I can and I do enjoy cooked food (and cooking) with varieties of method, I get board really quick otherwise....

One thing I'm not so keen on doing this job is tiding up. I get chocolate everywhere and I got  a tiny kitchen, I wish I had a KP (kitchen porter) to wash up for me, I don't even have my boyfriend here either... 

I can almost hear my pastry chef nagging next to me....again.....

Smile to my Ego on my mat

Always makes me smile when I bump into my ego on the mat. It all starts from simple things....

When my teacher correct postures for other students (or when she's giving other students attention), I can hear my voice saying: " what about me? " Me, me , me, all about me, how self-centred I am and no consideration to other people. And when she corrects my alignment, my voice says " what about her? (could be anyone apart from me, of course) " can't win, can't you? 

I realised when I come into recovery (from drug & alcohol addiction), I wasn't the centre of the Universe. Actually, I'm a part of the universe, not the centre. It was hard to accept that I wasn't significant to other people other than to myself and my family. For example, I am sitting in a cafe as I'm writing this, having my drink, about 25 people here. They all don't know me. Funny thing is that when my addiction was/is in full power, I tend to think " Hey, don't you know me? I'm Norie! I'm special." Beginning to think I should get a special treat... It's quite comical really my brain actually does that, and start to believe it. 

Another voice I hear in my head is to start comparing with myself to other students who are more advanced or longer experience on yoga etc, and make myself feeling inferior, jealousy, insecurity, all leads to my self-confident and self-esteem. I came from such a low self esteem ( non- existence) , sometimes challenging to build up. 

Again, once go back to my practise, they all go. I start concentrate on practise I'm doing, and remember to be grateful and happy with what I have today, and all my ego start disappearing. 

Actually I really love and appreciate when my teachers correct my postures. Sadly, my favourite youtube yoga teachers can't come out from my laptop and correct me.... (I hope to save up money to go to see them!) I sometimes blame those vids, "too fast!" "too advanced for me!" and thinking of giving up. I always gave up things I couldn't do especially when I was growing up, it was easy to give up but hard to build self-esteem from that. Those behaviour creep up on my yoga mat. 

When I come across challenging situations, these days, I tend to try out different ways to crack them. Just like how I do my practise. Instead of blaming others (youtube video/ teachers), I slowly work towards those yoga poses, and take a baby step by step. . ., this works for me fine.  Only me making things complicate and difficult for myself (silly me!), that is why I need to remember to make things simple....

One more voice I hear was....complaining about Ashtanga yoga. I used to moan a lot.
I never liked ashtanga yoga, once I did it loooong time ago, I didn't like it. But I gave it another go, and I booked 6weeks class for beginners classes. Tried a few, then still did not like it. Then good few years passed. One day, I was watching youtube and found a video completely changed my attitude towards it. This person was doing so peacefully and calmly. Now I found peace and serenity in the yoga.  What an beautiful practise! Since then, I've been trying out workshops and home practise.  I see the same peace in martial arts, kung fu, karate, kyu-dou, calligraphy etc, they all have it. 

I want that peace.

By the way, 

I remember when I was growing up, I used to go to classes in calligraphy for 6 years and it was a part of study subjects too (so I did about 12 years in total...), if my attention was everywhere I could not write/draw. I needed to centre myself and be calm to do it... I didn't know that time, I just realised recently. I had ADHD (still have, but those days, it was worse and there was no such diagnosis, of course), I found really hard to keep still and I just did not have enough attention span to do it, so, I did what I could manage. I still do, I just do what I can manage, not doing everything anymore. I'm still "human being", not "human-doing". 

For me, that's why yoga helps. Qi gong helps. 

After my class, I walk home and give myself smile meeting my ego on my mat. 

What yoga does to me

Today, I had really intense shift at work, I work as a support worker for people with learning disabilities. Love my job, always wanted to do it.

When I feel really intense and feel stressed, I feel around my head (top head) and my shoulders and back start to tense up. Today, I noticed ,within this intensity, there were release moments, even a just 1 second. What I noticed myself doing was that I was breathing out every time I got these moments. For instance, when I sat down on a chair in the canteen, I felt release and I breathed out. As soon as our clients calling my name and asking for my attention, the intensity increased. 

It was just a bit like my yoga classes, sequences my teacher does. Almost as if I could hear her saying "enjoy the release..." especially after a plank sequence or warrior sequence, finish with 3 leg down dog or go onto child pose, really feel the release and really nice. It was a bit like that. I spoke to her this afternoon about it, when I attended her 12 step yoga.

Anyway, all in all, I felt like I had really good shift and enjoyed every moments despite of hard, challenging day. Then I remembered this morning's early practise....

I went to my early yoga class this morning (starts 6:30am). At the end, on savasana, I went to deep again, I was tripping. I started to see images and I saw me doing this shift already today, and feeling really fantastic thinking "I really had a good shift".

That was exactly how I felt after my shift. 

When I came out from savasana, I felt a bit confused, I thought I finished this shift, but I hadn't... What happened? 

Then question....

What does yoga do to our brain? I know it produces brain chemicals like GABA, endorphin, dopamine etc, what else? I can search on Internet for hours and hours (that's what I do with youtube...) however, I'm not going to do that. To be honest I can't be bothered. Shall I get really lazy and get Marcus (my boyfriend) to search it for me?

I think just leave it for now...... and have a mug of mate tea.... 

Let's watch youtube in a meantime.

Yoga--- the best drug?

I really think sometimes, "why didn't I find yoga earlier?"

Obviously, it wasn't my journey to find yoga when I was in London cheffing, or even earlier. I remember my mum used to tell me she used to do yoga a bit when she was young, but when I was growing up, I didn't think much of it.

Even when I was a school girl, I had really stiff body, as I got older it got worse and worse! 
Cor, blimey, even my own mother couldn't believe and quite often questioned me why my body was so stiff (lack of excise? and too many cakes!). By the time in my 20's in London, my body was super stiff, spending the most of my time drinking and going out. Eventually went into mind-altering substances (quite quickly got worse..), since then, I never looked back until things got really really bad.

I thought those drugs gave me the best feelings apart from the consequences...... (but I didn't know that time...)

Well, well, well, I've began to feel really euphoric on savasana (my favo asanas. yummy!). It doesn't happen every time, but started to happen more and more. Tonight, my lovely yoga buddy, Vic, felt the same as me. That was awesome. I felt going really deep in savasana, I felt like I was tripping. Lots of different images and feelings, colours, I noticed myself going deeper and deeper. I knew that it wasn't only me feeling like this. 

When I opened my eyes, I was totally spaced out. 

First time I felt like this, I saw 70's floral patterns appeared on my yoga mat as well and they were moving! The patterns I saw were the same patterns (or similar) when I was off my head.

How did I feel? I can not explain how fantastic I felt after my practise. I never felt like this. It was just really calmly, peacefully awesome..... 

I told my yoga teacher with great excitement " the best drug ever! Why didn't I start earlier?"
And the best bit of this is: I can feel it with being clean, serene and sober. I feel good about myself both physically and mentally. No crap come down. Builds my self-esteem. Self- awareness. Feel energised and the same time really chilled out. Feel full of love. Become healthy mentally, physically & spiritually. Full of gratitude. No self-hatred. And letting go... Endless list of positive things. Thank you very much to my yoga teacher, Jacqui.

I just keep going now. 



Sahasta 
Yoga and sports massage in Suffolk
www.sahasta.co.uk

My yoga practice---this morning

I went to my Saturday class this morning. I like Saturday one, it's 2hours and we practise forearm balancing poses after we do all hard work! It's really worth it. I think because hard work, I feel sense of achievement, bump up my self confidence and self esteem, all good yummy ingredients to be "me".

Well, when the time to practice "falling angel" and "scissor legs side crow",  I started off doing really well. Then, when we moved to scissors leg one, I felt myself losing patience. I felt that last week, but I put that under the carpet, I didn't really want to admit it. Then it brought it up again this morning, I thought It was time to explore what it was making me so impatience. 

After the class, I wanted to hear what my teacher thought and had a quick chat. She shared some of her story of her students too. Kind feel better I am not the only one being like that. Anyway, when I got home, I realised why. I seem to lose my concentration, and "ah, I've been looking forward to do that today" then I started to hurry myself, "let's do it now and get it over with." Almost as if I could tick it off my "to-do-list", that kind of thing. 

I do that at work. I always done it. When I was a chef, I did my M.E.P (prep list), I write a to-do-list at work, I do shopping list, every opportunities, I make lists. And I love ticking off, because I feel like I've done something, I've achieved something. 

For yoga practice, I know now it doesn't work like this, especially for me. I need to leave my excitement aside, and calm myself down, just concentrate what I have in front of me. Do it one by one, remind myself I have time for it. 

Actually it reminds me of when I was cheffing. The last place I used to work in London. Busy morning, lots to do on my "list, I had full of ingredients on my bench. I was in "shit"( very professional term!), my head chef came to me and said: "tidy up every thing, go upstairs and have a fag!" And he started tiding up my bench. I thought he was an bastered, told him I didn't have time for that. But he forced me to do that anyway, and I listened (I had to, had to listened what the head chef said). My bench was empty and cleaned, I went upstairs to smoke a cigarette (I quit this 4 years ago too) . Came back in the kitchen, and started again. Result? Thanks to my lovely head chef (I didn't think that time), It was very smooth. I worked much better, and my products looked happy and tasted even more yummy. It's easy to forget that. I just need to keep remind myself when I'm impatience till it comes natural.

I always smile to myself when I realise how I am, and even laugh at myself, how funny I am. This is another my motto, "don't take things seriously and personally" and smile. 

My yoga practice---Last night

I, yet again, had fantastic yoga practice last night. 

I've attended about 6 classes this week. I enjoy my practice. It has taken my qi gong to another level too. I love it! Every time I do qi gong, qi gong speaks to me now and feel completely different from before. All helps, doesn't it.

Last night, it wasn't as intense as usual and shorter routines, different clients.... It was an awesome. 

When we were in savasana, I felt energy came up from my base, by then, I was already feeling spiral and started seeing lights. After the class, I asked my teacher If she did sequence on the base. She said yes.

She did that before, her classes are usually really challenging. Slow vinyasa flow, really work on core and build strength and flexibility, I really enjoy the challenging slow sequence. It gets really intense and the release from them are just phenomenon. One day, after savasana, on short meditation, cross legged, feeling really spiral, and then, I felt energy came up from the base through whole of my body. I only felt like that when I did qi gong, I wasn't expected to experience that again, with yoga, in such a short time getting back. Cor, blimey, that was really powerful. 

Then I walked back to my home. It was really misty. 

I looked up the sky, moon was above the mist, still shining. Then I saw each tiny individual particles, they were really tiny, I stopped and watched them coming down from the sky. Very pretty. I was feeling quite jolly, I wanted to share it with someone, so I shared it with my friends Russell and Vicki today. 


In the cafe today...
I met up the Russell and Vicki at the lunch time in a cafe in the town. Nice little cafe. We had lots of chat and laugh, and some nibbles. Had lovely time. We wanted to have cakes, but couldn't fine it anywhere on the menu. 

As we were about to go out, Vikcki pointed pout there were little boards for cakes, What? I was a bit gutted. As she pointed out to the boards, they fell on the floor before even I looked at. Anyway, Vicki said it might've been Marcus who hide the cake menu board from me, as I have been having a bit cakes this week. I couldn't sleep because having itchy back, heart burn, stomachache etc, I get all this If I have a bit too many cakes, but I still do it. Silly me!

Funny thing is, Marcus texted me on Wed night, after me getting back from Norwich seeing my friend Emma. Saying; "are you itchy?" ???? what is he talking about? I hadn't even spoken to him about my cake intake this week..... When he popped in, asked him how he knew, he said, he got a notification from facebook I put out a post " Oh, cakes, cakes cakes, why are you so yummy and lovely looking? I had 2 of you on monday, and tuesday, and this massive piece today! yum yum!" with photo of my cake and Emma with a cake...... Marcus doesn't do facebook.... 

My yoga practice--2nd round!

I haven't written a blog for ages. So, I decided to change my blog. I sometimes just want to write my thoughts, so I changed it. "Yes, Andy I changed it!" 

Early this year, it was about late March, I started getting back to practising yoga and wanted to be an instructor. During working in an care homes for elderly as an carer, I always felt If I was a qualified to instruct/show old people to move and right excise, it would help their mobility and help to cope with some of medications they were on for ages... that was in my head, It wasn't my intension to be anything else. I just wanted to do some light excise/chair yoga and qi gong with them. 

So, I met up with my friend Siobhan, who was an experienced yoga teacher, for an advice. After chatting, decided to go ahead of training to be an yoga instructor. Initially, I thought it was fine to just do the course on line and I'm on the tight budget (my job doesn't pay well), I don't have spare cash to pay for my training for £2-3000. On line course was just right and fit into my busy, shift work. 

So, now it's been 6-7 months passed. I'm nearly finish with my paperwork. How many hours I've been doing? Been doing lots and I'll just carry on till fill my attendance paper. 

Anyway, how's it been? 

It's been really enjoyable, I'm not only saying about the course, just the whole experience of practising yoga. I started once a week, then twice a week, then three times a week... When I couldn't attend class, I practiced at home with youtube. ( I have some favo channels, tell you later!)

Now, I attend classes whenever I can, this week, I've done 6 classes plus 1 home practice. I now dedicated to my yoga practice. Just like I did for my qi gong.

I didn't realise, when I started getting back, I would love yoga so much. I didn't love this much before. I thought yoga was "alright". I really liked it, but not this much like now. 

What's changed? 
Me! I've changed. 

I enjoy, when my yoga practice shows me how I do my life and yoga practice have connection. When I come across challenging asanas, I need lots of practising, and patience. Need to practise asanas bit by bit (baby step, I shall say) and finding different ways, asking or watching different people doing it etc. And that's exactly how I deal with challenging situations in my life or work. I need to ask experienced staffs at work how they deal with clients, suggestions, advice, their stories... and it really helps me. This is just one example of many experience so far I've been having for last 6-7 months.  

When I bumped into my ego on my mat, so frustrated with myself why I couldn't get into certain asanas, losing my patience. I blamed on my age. Who else I could blame? What else I could blame? I didn't want to admit I was the only person there. This is my old behaviour (it's easy to blame someone else, not taking responsibility for my behaviour), I thought I left in the past when I got clean from drugs etc, worked on myself. Ha ha ha, still there in me. That's how those behaviours creep up when I'm not mindful. 

Then my practice, actually reminded me (again!) to let go and be in present moment (how many times I hear that phrase). And then, it went. Since then, I have now faith, it will come and body will respond (and it's happening!  Actually it was said by a yoga teacher from one of my favo vids on youtube and I really hang on to that), as long as I'm healthy and fit that's all matters at this moment. I'm still really impatience, "I want What I want I want it NOW!!!" Oh, no, not now, I wanted y'day. That's how I am, but If I let my addiction to run my life and will all tits up. 

Anyway, back to my course, I feel sometimes lonely. I met some people doing teacher trainings at yoga centres and they have peers. I don't. I would love to have peers and chat about the course and progress about yoga practice. That is why I enjoy chatting with my yoga buddies even they are not on teacher trainings.  

At this moment I'm not sure If I teach yoga next year and not entirely confident with it, I've changed my initial plans. Anyway, it's still miles away in future, so, don't have to think about that right now. It doesn't matter If I go into teaching or not, I just enjoy the whole experience practising yoga, that's all.

By the way, is it only me? I don't really like the word teaching/teacher etc....

de-cluttering day at Marilyn's

Cor, blimey, Marcus had lots to clear his DVDs, CDs and books. When he left the chapel where he used to live on the border of Suffolk and Essex, he took some of his clutter to his mum's. (Thanks, mum, that's what mum's for! cheeky...)

We were thinking of doing car boots sale, but never got round it. When we sorted, some were broken, scratched or out dated etc, so decided to take them to charity shops. Some, I've put them on amazon and eBay, just waiting for some notifications. 

De-cluttering makes me feel good. Feels like I'm actually doing something, clear some space for more, new things to come in. This is how I feel after de-cluttering: "Just been to the toilet, I was constipating for a while, and spending 20mins sitting on the toilet, finally I was able to release...", that kind of feeling. if you are eating food, please excuse me. :-)

Actually it was quite inspirational for me to de-clutter mine too. When I got back, I did a bit, because I quite often take my clutter to charity shops, I don't really have much. Well, at moment...

My friend Russell and Vicki love doing car boot, they are already planning to do some more this year. You know what I said when he told me their plans for this year, "Again? how much more clutter do you have???" It puzzled me. How one can own so much stuffs? 

Well, easily done, I used to be a collector (not a hoarder), I collected, collected, and collected so much clutter. When I got rid of 80% of them (which I didn't need), I felt much better. Felt like finally dealt with some old stuffs (both physical and emotional), felt new "me" was born! Now, I got my flat, not cluttered, but I got lots of: clothes, books, Cd's, cooking/kitchen stuffs and stocked up cupboard...I reckon (it's not an excuse) I don't have as much as some of my friends, so, I'm alright. (I hope) 

After spending a couple hours clearing, Marcus and I drove up to the local tip in Saxmundham. It was tidy and quiet. Unlike one in Sudbury, it's usually need to queue for long time.

By the time we went back to Marilyn's, bless her, she made some lunch. It was really lovely surprise, and finished our day with delicious salads and soup. 

 Avocado salad

 Kidney bean and puy lentil salad

 Carrot and beetroot coleslaw

 Yummy Greek olives!

Locally picked apples 

 Artichoke soup with toasted German rye bread

Aaaarh, I feel hungry now, what shall I cook tonight?

Day in Norwich with my friend Emma

This time I went up and stayed overnight with Emma at her flat. We had lurvly 2days. We spent all day y'day going round charity shops in Norwich, this time we did about 20 shops. Last time we did 13 shops. Cor, blimey I never been to so many charity shops in a day. Had fantastic buy, time and laugh! Felt like I was on holiday. I have now lots of nice clothes to sell on eBay for next week. I can't wait. Hopefully I can do a bit better next time, it's been really bad.

We also popped into lovely organic food store with cafe attached, we bought vegan sos roll, oh, man, it was delicious. What i liked the most was very light pastry, and of course, wasn't buttery either. I think I will try to make it with gram flour and lentil filling, might do that this week.

Vegan sos roll, yummy!

4th of Feb

After pottering round on charity shop tour, we went back to Emma's flat, left shopping there, and went out again into the town. We went to "king of hearts" cafe, and again, we had yummy cake. I had gluten free orange cake, Emma had yummy almond and raspberry cake. They were delish. Of course, I had my cake with lapsang souchong tea. Aaaarrr, it was heaven.

In the eve, we were going out for dinner, but feeling a bit tired, so, i cooked some quick pasta and salads. Just simple penne with lentil sauce, daikon and carrot sesame salad and tomato and okura salad with soy ginger dressing. Nice and light dinner, booja booja chocolate truffles ( small packet ones) after. Yum yum 

I realised later, this booja booja chocolate hazelnut one contained sugar, but raspberry one didn't. I'm pretty sure they never had sugar before, they used to be our regular treats as Marcus doesn't do sugar very well, we always went for sugar-free option... We don't have them anymore.....

5th/ Feb

Today, I hooked up with our friend Steve for coffee while Emma was gone for her badminton class at the hospital. Then she picked me up at 11am, we went round a few charity shops, then off to lunch.

Cor blimey, I hadn't had such a lovely food for long time. Maybe since when I was in London (apart from Japan, of course!). The cafe bar restaurant was called "workshop", food was Turkish ish, Arabic ish food, my kind of food. Easy to eat, lovely to look at, exotic ingredients and super delicious. 

Yum Yum, Emma!

 Plantain chick pea cake with sour cream dip

Halloumi cheese and wilted spinach

Veggie Pizza

It was delicious. Loved the pizza very much. i hadn't had pizza for good a couple of years (or more), this home baked pizza reminded me of pizza we used to make in one of restaurants I used to work. We used to make lovely pizza (we used to serve home baked breads) for staff meals! They were delish, I missed it very much. I think I'll make gluten-free crunchy pizza soon....

 Orange and pistachio pancake with mascaporne and Turkish honey

Girl who was working behind the counter, she was working really hard, told her she should get pay rise for amount she was working that day. I felt it was under staffed in front of the house. 

Since then, I still sometimes dream about the food. Can't wait for the next visit. I'd love to have their hummus and pitta bread.


 Workshop cafe bar  

53 Earlham Road 
Norwich
Norfolk 
NR2 3AD 

Tel: 01603 615853

- Open: Mon 5pm-11pm, Tues-Sat 10am-11pm, Sun 12pm-10:30pm

- Vegetarian options: Plenty

- Wheelchair access: Yes

Spicy roasted nuts

I sometimes really fancy savoury nuts. I eat raw cashews and almond quite a bit, but sometimes I want to eat spicy ones. Every time looking at them in shops (walking up and down isles many times), I give up buying, because they have sugar or some funny stuffs in them. 

Then this afternoon, walking along one of isles in my local supermarket, suddenly brain waved! Why don't I make my own. I quite often tell people to make their own, but I forget I should do that too. 

Once It got into my head, I quickly picked a bag of raw cashew nuts and almond. Feeling excited and cycled back home. 

Looking at my nuts, quickly opened them started roasting with some spices. I made 2 batches. Not too much, but just enough for next a couple of days, if they last....

I roasted in low temperature for about 20 mins or so. I kept checking, otherwise I burn them, just like I used to with roasted pine nuts and brandy snaps when I was cheffing. 

When they were done, they looked slightly dried, let them cool, then.... I tasted. It was delish, moorish and yummy. Why didn't make my own before, cheaper and I know what's in them. I know roasting isn't great, raw is much better, still, I love different flavours in foods and cooking methods, how they bring up flavours differently than eating raw. Anyway, this is what I did. Aaaand, much healthier than shop bought ones anyway.

200g nuts of your choice

1teaspoon Cumin

1teaspoon ground coriander

2 teaspoon smoked paprika

1/2 teaspoon ground chili

Almond oil

Put  all nut in a baking tray, drizzle some almond oil (not too much, need a about a half table spoon), mix all spices, sprinkle on nuts, with spoon, mix well till all nuts are well coated.

Place in oven at 120 , for about 15- 20 mins. Let cool in the tray. 

Apple & blackberry cake made with convenience food

Today at work, I made a lovely cake. It tasted nicer than what i expected. I personally wanted to make nice fresh apple cake but, we had nothing in our fridge, fruits wise..... I talked my boss y'day, they ere cutting on some fresh ingredients due to the wastage. We don't have many old people in the house till the main house gets refurbished. So, they started to get a little more convenience foods.

Well, if granny gives you tins of fruits from her cupboard because she is tidying up her old stocks, sometimes can't refuse, feels really rude not to accept... Then take them home, looking at them thinking, what am I guanna do with them, I only eat fresh fruits..... (^_^;)  She means well, doesn't she? Also, if you are on budget living like me, then decide to buy bargain tin fruits. This is the one of solutions for you.

I made "apple & blackberry cake". I used small tin of apple & blackberry (mixed), when I opened it, it was nice purple colour with cornflourly sauce. To be honest, I wasn't sure what the taste like, I decided to used the tin anyway. (o^^o)

This is how I made: 

1.5 cups flour ( half white flour, a half whole meal flour)
1.5 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 cup sugar
3 eggs---beaten
a half cup oil
1 tin blackberry and apple (250g can)
handful walnuts---chopped

sift all dry ingredients in a bowl
add sugar
add wet ingredients to the bowl and using bakers spatula, mix well
drop into 2 small loaf tins ( i think about 350-400g tin)
bake at 180℃ for 30mins or skewer comes out clean
*I always set 30mins to start off with, then, check every 5-10mins

Serve with drop of creme fraiche (if you take dairy products) on the side

This cake was really nice, craft was chewy, moist in the middle. I know it's not particularly healthy, but taste nice and turned up to be ideal cake with lovely brew. Rooibos or lapsang souchong  tea will well go with the cake. 

Hungry Norie --- Excalibur 4 trays dehydrator review "It Sucks!"

I only bought this products in last May 2013. Do you remember, I was soooo excited about my new purchase. I loved it and made crackers, "flapjacks", chocolate nutty squares, dried fruits and many more.

After 7 month using it on and off, it finally died on me. Last a couple of month, the temperature control stopped working, it got really hot (hotter than I set on temperature control), I had to lower the temperature, even that, couldn't get quite the temperature I wanted.

Now, it stopped to blow warm air, fan was still working, but didn't get even warm after 1 hour with max temperature. I already soaked lots of crackers mix for our snacks, I now BAKED in the oven with lowest temperature. It was too hot (my oven isn't very good for baking), I burned it! What a waste. 

I thought, well, the temperature control got broken, so I searched on the web for hours, how to fix, where to get the parts, manufacturer's guarantees, the distributor's page etc.

Then I came across "amazon.com /review the product" page. Apparently, I wasn't the only one having this problem after using less than 1 year / 6 month. Some people had it after using it ONCE! I'm sure there are people out there, quite happy using their purchase. But not me. 

I only could afford to buy this product at that time, also, I only have a small kitchen, I don't have a huge space for bigger models. But now, I wish I saved a bit more money to buy at least 5 trays or different brands. 4 trays sucks.... I'm really disappointed with the dehydrator. I was really looking forward to the purchase, after 3 years wanting it, I finally decided to invest into this. (Every time I had money, spent on holidays, can't have everything, I'm on a budget living!)

Then I came across this site: greensmoothie.com. The lady who owns the site did some blogs about this equipment for its specs. It was written on 19/Jan/2014. She clearly stated that it wasn't suitable for drying raw foods due to higher temperature. This hasn't got a proper thermostat, apparently even Roger Orton (who owns the company) doesn't even recommend to people who would like to do raw food. 

WHAT? Why the hell did they produce this model then? So, they more or less knew it had this issue, thermostat doesn't work properly. Yes, there were times during last 6 month, I wished I bought a bigger model, but I thought it was a good idea that time purchasing this 4 tray one. I wish I could come across this review before my purchase (really good site). I would recommend to anyone who are thinking of buying to read this blog/ review. I would defo NOT recommend, get some other ones!

I felt like I was ripped off ( didn't feel like that for long time.) I'm sure I'm not the only one feeling like this. There's a lady who wrote one of the reviews on amazon.com, she even had to pay for the return shipping and repair parts, wasn't it under warranty? Sounded like the machine was only under a year from the date she purchased. Doesn't it come with 5 year manufacturer's guarantee in USA? Sounds really wrong. 

Anyway, My dehydrator not only temperature control stopped working, front door doesn't even shut properly, black cover which protects the motor came away, (bits fell off), when I lifted up, it had a big hole on the far right corner? What the hell is going on my dehydrator? It doesn't look safe, so I packed away. 

I do look after my kitchen equipments. I came from cheffing back ground, I was taught by my head chefs and sous chefs to look after own knives and all the equipments. Otherwise they nag you like a mum.  That's why I was really shocked what happened to my poor dehydrator. These are photos I took last night before packing away.

The motor got really hot even just blowing cold air. It doesn't do anything else but blowing cold air

One day after using a few months, plastic held the case and screw bit came off. I thought I could get the spare parts, but Excalibur don't seem to have this in their on-line shop.

I didn't realise till last night, when I lifted up, there was a big hole! How did it happened?
This is really bad. All plastics came off & feel really crumbly. Thank God, it didn't blow up!

Looks really wonky. It doesn't even shut properly, air leaked from the gap on the top. It has a slight dent. Apparently air should escape from the front door in order to dry out. Still, how the door shut, how much air escapes etc, is it supposed to be like this? 

I emailed the distributor I bought this machine from. I'm currently awaiting for the reply. It's Sunday today, hopefully I'll hear from them what I should do tomorrow. Also, ring them too. I'm really not happy. I wonder if there are some people out there who got same experience as me with this model???