Me & my cancer: Journey began...

 

Blossom tree found near Captain's wood

My first appointment was to see an oncologist and a specialist nurse. I took Marcus with me for very first appointment, I wasn't confident enough to be able to hear and understand consultations. He made me a few appointments for treatment. My very first treatment was  2 bags of blood transfusion. Cor blimey, after the transfusion, I felt so much better. On my way there, I felt so ill, I had to rest many times to get to the train station! What a difference it made!  As I was leaving the day unit, I said a nurse who looked after me good-bye and thanked her for looking after me. 

A few day after, Thursday morning, I had a phone call from Addenbrooke's hospital oncology day unit, asking me to come out asap for chemotherapy. I was a bit upset, I had a class to teach in the morning and had to cancel it. I could refuse the treatment that day, but I wanted to show my willingness to be able to attend appointments. Marcus was busy, so I asked my friend to come with me for my first chemotherapy. And she did, she quickly finished her work and helped me to get to the treatment. We arrived just after lunch time.  I had my very first chemotherapy. Carboplatin and paclitaxel. By then I had got used to needles and cannula, it was very strange me being hospital that often... I was always healthy person, never really being hospital in the past ( maybe a few times...). We chatted a lady who was next to me having her chemotherapy accompanied by her grandson. Marcus turned up late afternoon to take over from my friend. I still this day, feel so grateful for my friends who helped me those challenging time. I wasn't able to get through it without their help and support. I am a lucky person to have good friends. 

Symptom wise, by then I had really bad night sweat ( I believed it was caused by menopause for long time until my surgeon told me it wasn't😅), very frequent toilet visit ( 7-10 times during night), extreme thirst ( drunk so much water, still feeling thirsty.), full quickly, abdominal discomfort/ pain, chest pain, bloating, hair loss ( after my 2nd cycle), fatigue, heavy bleeding from down below ( even worse since I was on blood thinners), muscle pain, neuropathy, taste change, etc....

It was hard, I wasn't even able to change lines on my bed. Took me about 1 hour to do it. Everything I was doing became hard work. Like putting socks on, knickers on, cooking was hard, I wasn't able to stand up to warm soup up. So I brought a chair in the kitchen to warm food. I hardly cooked. My friends brought me food or bought me lunch/dinner. At work, Marcus carried my bag with yoga mat in for me into studios. Friends gave me lift to gyms, studios for classes. I really take granted being healthy and able to do things pre - cancer days.  I really felt it. When I was growing up, my mum used to say to me health is very important, and precious, I finally understood what she meant. 

Stones from Suffolk shingle beach

After 2nd cycle of chemotherapy, my oncologist informed me it wasn't working, and tumour was still growing. So we stopped chemo, I was continued with blood transfusions and dexamethasone to control tumour until my surgery day. 

Everyday I noted what happening to my body, what meds I took and what time, I even made myself bowel chart ( I was constipated, and on laxative) to watch my bowel movement. I just wanted to do well with this journey. Luckily, I didn't feel sick from chemo, just felt really fatigued.

I cried many times, I felt so fed up going back and forth to hospital, scans, chemo, test after test....sorting out my finance at the same time. I stopped teaching one point, so my income reduced basically nothing. So I needed to claim benefit. With feeling unwell to sorting out my finance was hard work. I wanted to give up, just everything became too much. I couldn't even clean and tidy my flat.  I couldn't even think straight... I did whatever I could. If I couldn't do it, I din't do it. I took my time to do my chores. I wasn't teaching anymore that point, so I had all day to do one or two tasks a day. I didn't do anymore than that. I slept a lot though. 

Luckily, I had a good appetite, I reckon this due to steroid I was on too, I ate loads! But Now I look back, with health I had pre-cancer days and appetite, I was able to get through this tough time. I just kept going. By the December 2019, my beautiful friend Mel helped me a lot for accompanying me to my hospital appointments. 

Nearly my surgery time....

Me & my cancer : I was diagnosed...Ovarian cancer

 

(Dunwich Heath)

I don't know where to start....

I have been on this cancer journey since 2019 summer....I was diagnosed ovarian cancer clear cell stage 3b. It was like someone throw bombed at me. I guess, I was in denial for a few weeks, or more, just couldn't believe I got cancer. I didn't want to believe it.  I had a few good close friends had cancer previous year, I thought then, " next one might be me?" Later, one of my friends said; "these days cancer isn't death sentence, you'll be alright"... I really hang on to that.😊

In 2019 May, I went back to Japan for a few weeks, really enjoyed being with my family and friends. I had some yummy food, did lots of yoga, and met some new people.... Came back, after a few weeks, I started feeling unwell, coughing really badly which didn't go away. Then I started feeling fatigue, I wasn't even able to walk into town without having rest a couple of times, on top of that, I found really challenging to cycle...my quads didn't lift....Started feeling even worse, so I decided to make an appointment with GP and saw a lady doctor. She was lovely and listened what I was telling her. She gave me a week course of antibiotics thinking I had chest infection. 

After a week, it didn't go away, still really fatigued and felt it got worsened. I rung GP again, to see another doctor. He sent me to bloods at the West Suffolk hospital. In the meantime, he gave another course of antibiotics 3 times a day for a week. Then I went for bloods that day. 

Following day, he contacted me to see another doctor at the surgery in the evening, which I did. He explained over the phone, I was very very anaemic, and sounded very concerned. Anyway, I went to see another doctor in the evening. He saw me and I explained why I possibly anaemic. ( I had discharging for previous 6-7 month every day, a bit like 4th day period) He sent me another bloods and booked me CT scan in 3 weeks time. It was Thursday. 

(Spring in Southwold)

On Friday evening, when I came back from work ( teaching yoga class at the local yoga studio), I felt really unwell, wasn't able to move, and I couldn't breathe. I asked My partner, Marcus, to take me to A&E, we were there till about 3am. In the end, thanks to A&E doctor there who forwarded my CT scan to following day ( Saturday). We went back to the hospital at 9pm, had CT scan, whilst waiting for the result, I was given a bag of IV iron followed by IV fluid and felt a bit better. One of doctors informed me I had lots of blood clots in my both lungs which caused coughing.

I was admitted that day for monitoring, ended up staying there for a week. 

Following day, doctor booked me for another CT scan for abdomen area to see why I was discharging. The result came back quite quick, two gynaecologists came to see me and delivered news. I had ovarian cancer. 

I called my partner in the afternoon to speak to doctors for more detail, we were both shocked. I had feeling something wrong with my womb, but never thought it was ovarian cancer. 

After a week, I came out from the hospital, cancelled some yoga classes I was teaching. I was sad, but the same time felt relieved that I had diagnosis. I was called from the hospital for biopsy and consultation a few day later. The gynaecologists informed me I was referred to Addenbrooke's in Cambridge. Once referred, the process of getting treatments and seeing an oncologist were so fast. Thanks to NHS, for quick response and I was lucky to be here to receive treatments.  

This is how my journey with cancer started.....😊

Outdoor music in Snape Maltings (25/07/2021)

 

This evening we went to see an African band in Snape maltings in Suffolk ( near where I live). It's free summer concert until the end of August. One band a day, Wednesday to Sunday, at 5:30pm start. We were there on Friday too, for opening jazz concert. This evening was a band called " Abel Selaocoe & Chesaba", their sound was really funky African. An Irish guy on the right plays bass and guitar, and he played a tune from Radiohead with African twist. I thought it was excellent too, I looked up to the sky, and birds flying over the stage, warm air and breeze on my skin, thought what a lovely evening it was...

This African music was awesome😍I wanted to dance, but no one was dancing, I hear due to Covid regulations, no dance was allowed, is that true? What about Latitude this weekend? I am sure everyone was dancing there! 🧐

Anyway, I thought this was such an good idea, thanks to Snape Maltings which made this happened. It was so civilised, warm summer evening we were outside listening to music. No  one was getting drunk, just listening to good music and watched performance. They were entertainers too, with good sense of humour getting involved with audience. I smiled all the way rhyming with my body, almost as if their music was communicating with us and our body, which the drummer was saying about music. 

We booked more concerts for next a few weeks, I am really looking forward to them. Snape released more free tickets, if you go on their website under Dome stage, all the bands who are playing are there. And why not this "Dome stage concert" make part of your day/night out? 

My life is good whatever happens, I am grateful being here and enjoy every moment. My 7th cycle of chemo starting this week, I am not looking forward to it, but life is worth fighting for. I am just doing my best everyday. 😊

Anyway, really enjoyed music this evening. Thank you Abel and his friends, for wonderful evening!